My New Years Thoughts About Michael by Nancy

My New Years Thoughts About Michael

by Nancy

Ok, I'll admit it. I'm one of those sentimental fools we all like to poke fun at from time to time. The kind that gets an idea and makes a plan that is beyond what any reasonable or rational person may be inclined to do.

So tonight, on the eve of New Years, right before midnight, I stepped outside. I was bundled in my coat, had on some warm gloves, and had my .Mp3 player ready to go. The temperature was frigid, only ten degrees, without the windchill effect I selected "You Are Not Alone", for this mission of devotion to my dear Michael. The weather channel predicted that tonight would be overcast in my area, but they were wrong.

The sky was clear all around and even stars made an appearance. Or perhaps meteorologists had been right, and 'someone' blew the clouds away...I like to think this was the case.

The blue moon shone above and I could see Michael's face reflected in it. I reached out my hand when asked and whispered three words at the proper moment. Then I felt for his presence. Waited.

In the meantime, I looked around me. The world was so bright! The moon lit up the entire back yard and caused all the trees to cast shadows on the layer of white crunchy snow. Fireworks began going off from the houses around me. Loud pops of noise in the night. One exploded nearby, bright green and perfectly full.

I gazed upwards once again, leaning my head back as far as I could with much discomfort. This pose was necessary because the moon was directly above me.

And as I was observing the moon, my glasses caused a refraction and suddenly there were two moons. I thought, one for you Michael, one for me. Two in the sky together tonight. A slight tip of the head and these two moons merged, and touched. I held this pose for as long as possible, contemplating this idea. Two souls touching. And I became aware that such a thing was entirely possible. Because of Michael.

Souls are touching one another because we are all joining in our mutual shock, grief and love of Michael Jackson. Many are touching in creative ways, mentoring and supporting one another artistically. Some are touching because they seek answers for his loss. Others are touching because of the void left behind. They are wanting to pursue and fill their need for anything at all related to his photographic images, music, dance, writing, artwork, thoughts, ideas, and philosophy. Others are touching for the mutual support and understanding they need to deal with his loss. Some are touching because their spirits are so open they have no choice, indeed feel a compelling need to touch with another. And many are touching for all these reasons combined.

All due to a little kid who was born in Gary, Indiana with enormous God-given talent and creativity. A child with big brown eyes and a smile that could light up every corner of an enormous stage. A child who worked hard when other children were playing. A little brown-eyed, irresistibly precious kid who gave up those moments of childish innocence and play we all have been able to enjoy, to remember from our youth. A child who was able to overcome racial prejudice with his amazing talents and ability and reach into all the hearts of everyone who took the time to watch and listen.

As a young man, while watching a television program with starving children in Africa, he told his mother he wanted to make a lot of money to help them. And so he did. This young man had a dream of being the best entertainer he could ever imagine. And so he was. Never satisfied, he knew that people would always want him to give them more. And so he did. Thinking bigger than most, he wanted a better world for himself and all the people around the globe. Taking his infinite hope that such a thing was possible, he sang lyrics that created a love for all those things in life worthwhile. Michael wanted to continue giving as much as he could to help others through good works and charity. And so He did. He wanted this message to be carried away in the hearts of all the people who had heard him sing, watched him dance. And so it was.

As an older, more mature man he had another vision, to once again grace the stage with his presence and awe us beyond our wildest imaginations. Sadly, the presence did not come to pass, he left our planet to the far outreaches of the Heavens to be with his Creator, the source of his life, wonderful talents, and love. But, to our great fortune, he filmed his preparations for this spectacle of creativity and wonder. Michael left behind just enough so that through the technological means of our times a movie was put together for all to enjoy him once more.

We were given one last chance to see his impeccable preparations in showmanship and staging, his grasp of all things related to new technology in film and animation, in lighting and effects. We were given a wonderful glimpse of his intuitive God-given musical genius, his still wonderful voice and dancing, and his charismatic magic. Michael had wanted to have been able to have this opportunity to show us his vision, to leave us with a message, and to let us see that he was still the greatest entertainer in our lifetimes. And so he did, while watching from above.

Did this little boy ever imagine that one day he would be known across the entire globe as the greatest entertainer in our time? Did he ever believe that his image at every opportunity would be captured which such zeal and pleasure? Or that every move he made would be watched and scrutinized as if placed under a microscope by the good and the bad persons of this world? Was his goal to create magic in music and dance to such a high level of skill that so many would want to emulate him? Did he dream that high?

I believe this little boy just loved to sing and dance. That this little boy was born with so much creativity that he was constantly in motion trying to expend it. That his mind was so nimble he absorbed more in a single minute than most could process in a day. That his heart was just so full of love that it burst forth in all directions. That his spirit was so enlightened with a strong belief in life everlasting that he couldn't help but share it. That his character was so supported through his good humble works that when burdens were placed upon him from many sources he was able to rise above them with much more stamina than any average person. I believe he was such a shining light that he did not seek fame as much as he just wanted to give all that was inside him to others. And that the people of this world sought him out and put him on a pedestal because of this same incredible shining light. I also believe that Michael Jackson joyfully gave all he had within himself to us with love and very rarely did his wants and needs come before the mission he set for himself at an early age.

So when with great sentiment, I wander outside to gaze upwards at another full moon, if you want to snicker at my silly behavior, I don't mind at all. Just remember, I am thinking of a brown eyed boy, born in Gary, Indiana, who grew into a man right before our eyes. A man who during his lifetime, grew his soul to such enormous proportions, that once it was taken Home, it still has the ability to touch ours. A soul so giving, that it also comforts us with just the thought of it's eternal existence. And a soul so loving, it continues to help others by creating an atmosphere of opportunity. Within this atmosphere lies our ability, as lowly humans, to reach out and allow our souls to meet, and touch with those around us who are also thinking of Michael.

No, I can't fathom that this little brown eyed boy, born Michael Jackson, of Gary, Indiana, ever imagined that.

A new year is just beginning. Over six long months without Michael walking the face of the Earth. While looking up at this full moon, a blue moon, I just feel the need to tell him: Thank you Michael. Your precious person and spirit are indelibly marked in my mind, heart and soul. You gave so much, that your giving goes on forever, from one tender soul to the next.